Waterpup

CEO –Chief Embezzlement Officer.

CFO– Corporate Fraud Officer.

BULL MARKET — A random market movement causing an investor to mistake himself for a financial genius.

BEAR MARKET — A 6 to 18 month period when the kids get no allowance, the wife gets no jewelry, and the husband gets no sex.

VALUE INVESTING — The art of buying low and selling lower.

P/E RATIO — The percentage of investors wetting their pants as the market keeps crashing.

BROKER — What my broker has made me.

STANDARD & POOR — Your life in a nutshell.

STOCK ANALYST — Idiot who just downgraded your stock.

STOCK SPLIT — When your ex-wife and her lawyer split your assets equally between themselves.

FINANCIAL PLANNER — A guy whose phone has been disconnected.

MARKET CORRECTION — The day after you buy stocks.

CASH FLOW– The movement your money makes as it disappears down the toilet.

YAHOO — What you yell after selling it to some poor sucker for $240 per share.

INSTITUTIONAL INVESTOR — Past year investor who’s now locked up in a nuthouse.

PROFIT — An archaic word no longer in use.

• Successful Investing Tips and Techniques The true, most basic motivation behind investing is to grow our investment. People who have invested before will take their...
• Buying Stocks Without A Full-Service Broker Especially in today's unstable and volatile market, investing can be a scary proposition. For many, a broker serves as a...
• Want to Be an Active Investor? Try a Fantasy Stock Market Game First! So you want to be an active investor? Maybe you think you have what it takes to cash in like...
• How to Destroy Your Investment Portfolio This is a guest article by Ray, the owner and primary author of Financial Highway, where he discusses investing, saving...
• Finance Reform Is Coming, But What Will It Look Like? Senator Chris Dodd has shown us what happens when you don't have to worry about meeting the obligations of your...